If we had no expectations we would never be disappointed. The inability to manage our expectations can stop us enjoying ourselves ‘in the moment.’ We all need to learn to be open-minded and enjoy the situation we are in right now.
To manage expectations is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as
Seek to prevent disappointment by establishing in advance what can realistically be achieved or delivered by a project, undertaking, course of action etc.
Unfortunately, if we had no expectations at all then we would quite likely achieve very little, because we would fail to try to achieve. According to Jan-Emmanuel De Neve and Tali Sharot, in Psychology Today,
Research suggests that ‘managing’ one’s personal expectations is easier said that done and could even be counterproductive.
The key to our wellbeing is not low expectations. It is the ability to interpret unexpected negative outcomes in a positive way.
If you are in a relationship where you are doing all the work to keep it going, it may be that you need to change the company that you keep. After all, we all know that it is impossible to change anyone else.
It is, however, unfair to put pressure on someone else to be something that they are not. We need to learn to accept people as they are – with their faults. Nobody is perfect; no job is perfect; and we can’t win all the time. Sometimes life is just disappointing.
The website, elite.com has this quote,
Give without expectation, accept without reservation, and love with hesitation.